Get You a Guy Best Friend

Get you a Guy Best Friend

About two days ago, one of my closest guy friends sent me a Facebook message with our four-year Friendversary video attached. After looking through all the pictures, I messaged him back “four years and counting!” This got me thinking about how blessed I have been to have close friendships with guys throughout my life, especially in college. Girls have thousands of reason for wanting to have a guy friend or two. They’re less drama, they can introduce me to their friends, etc. Well, those aren’t really good reasons, and in my experience not always true. Still, I love each close guy friend I’ve had throughout my life and definitely think that it is worth it to invest in friendships like these. Here are a few reasons why.

Reason #1: always up for a spontaneous adventure

Most of my fondest memories and ridiculous stories involve a guy friend of mine starting a question with “you guys wanna go..?” Most of the time I did want to go, sometimes I was tricked into going, but I always came back with a smile and laughing. These could be off the wall adventures, like going to obscure donuts shops and sneaking onto a beach to eat them at two in the morning, or something as simple as going to the cafeteria to eat. The place didn’t matter as much as the company. These guys were funny, ready to explore, and more curious about how to do something than concerned with whether or not to do it. Their spontaneity was infectious and made me want to try different things. Sometimes trying those things got me hurt because I’m not athletic and shouldn’t try and run up a wall, even if it’s a wall of trampolines. Other times those things were great leaps of faith like talking to a complete stranger about Jesus. All those things, good or bad, physically painful or spiritually stretching, those are things I remember and definitely don’t regret.

Reason #2: good accountability partners/ pull no punches with advice

My girl-friends are great at listening and telling me what I do and don’t want to hear, when I come to them for advice. However, I feel like I get something different when I talk things over with my guy friends. Their honesty and straightforwardness can be refreshing. I’ll come to someone with a question, and I’ll leave with a very blunt answer and at least three logical reasons to back up that answer. Sometimes they will give you the advice you didn’t ask for, but definitely need to hear. Once I overreacted and lashed out at someone and one of my best friends, Gary, was there to see it. I walked away from that, hoping to avoid confrontation. Two months later, Gary asked me if I ever apologized for that. I legit told him no and I was hoping they had just forgotten about it. He, in turn, told me that was dumb and irresponsible and to apologize as soon as I saw them. Sometimes that extra push or the in-your-face advice is exactly what I need. Even when I try my best to avoid it a good guy friend will give that to you.

Reason #3: pretty great cheerleaders

Now before you wonder why all my guy friends have been running around with pompoms hear me out. Whenever something big or exciting happens to me, I always tell my family and good friends. My girl-friends will get excited with me and congratulate me and ask details about it. But there’s something about when your guy friends get excited for you that take it to a whole other level. I told my friend Shane when I got my first job, and he was pumped about it! I was already excited, but his excitement for me added more excitement to it all. I feel like guys are really good at that, being excited for you and boosting your confidence in whatever you accomplish. You got a new job? That’s great, I bet that job was made for you! You got an A on that test you hardly studied for? Fantastic, I always knew you were a secret genius! You got the last chocolate chip cookie at the cafeteria? Awesome! You deserve it! Also, can I have a bite?! I always feel encouraged and empowered when sharing good news with guy friends.

Reason #4: open to vulnerability

A lot of people just assume that guys don’t show their emotions very well. However most the guys that I have befriended were very emotional people, in a good way. I felt able to share with them emotional struggles I had, and they felt the same way in sharing with me. We may not always have been able to understand exactly why they feel that way, but we can be empathetic towards each other. There have been many late night talks where I’ve unloaded my concerns and stress on guy friends. They’ve listened and either gave advice or were simply present for support. I’m happy I could be there for them too because one of the best things about any kind of friendship is being able to be open with one another and support each other however we can. 

 I’m very thankful for each guy friend that has come into my life. They may not be in my life anymore, or they recently entered into my life and I hope they stay for a while. Either way, I’ve been blessed by their friendship and the community they have brought along with their craziness.